In the interest of being honest, here is my latest fail in my shopping fast:
Yes, they are super cute salt and pepper shakers. Yes, I did forget that I was
on a shopping fast when I picked them up and saw they were clearanced to $1.50. And yes, I remembered the rules before I actually paid for them, but rationalized they were only $1.50 and I didn't want the clerk to think I was a weirdo and I wanted them.
Not shopping for myself is harder than I imagined in some ways. I'm discovering that part of what is hard is wrapped up in the way something new and shiny distracts me from stress. December is always a tight month financially for us- between Christmas with three kids, and taking unpaid time off work for me and Scott's part time job not using him- I can get a little stressed out about bills. And I have discovered when I feel that way, I tend to go shop for some little treat. How counter-productive is that??! But, in denying myself I am forced to face my quest for financial security, and it leaves me the space to turn to God. In confession of my fears. In repentance for trusting anything more than Him for provision. And in thanks for His grace and mercy and faithfulness to lead me closer to Him.
